At times it seems that I’m the only one that notices the rampant rude, indifferent and inconsiderate treatment customers receive from business employees. Even as aware as I am about this treatment, I let 80% of it slide. Most customers let 99-100% of it slide. As consumers, if we fail to take action, then we deserve what we get. As business people if we fail to heed the lessons of others, then we are doomed to mediocrity.

It’s obvious to the point of pain that when the average Walmart cashier bids you a good day that she really doesn’t mean it. She is just told to do it and she does it with a vengeance. Haven’t you ever wanted to ask these unfeeling drones, “Do you really mean it?” If you don’t call people to task, who will? Ignoring this treatment and not standing your ground makes you a bad customer. Am I the last angry man? Only the good customers will complain--something every businessperson should remember. Teaching your people how to be nice doesn’t work and is the failing of most customer service consultants. The training has to go much deeper than this. It’s about teaching those who need it, how to be a real person. It’s difficult for me to understand how owners can even hire people who aren’t exuding personality.

One of the most effective methods to improve your business is to put yourself in the customer’s shoes. Because I teach people the attitudes needed to serve people, perhaps I’m more sensitive to poor service. The anecdotes used in this book to illustrate what is happening to consumers are but a small excerpt from my personal experiences. If my customers were to hold bad feelings because of perceived indifference, lack of attention or aloofness of my people, I would certainly want to take steps to change attitudes. Remember, your people typically treat you with more respect than your customers. They should be treating customers better.

When confronting poor service, it’s truly understandable that some of you will say, “It’s not worth the effort!” “My life has enough problems.” I know that just coping with day-to-day living is much more stressful than it used to be. The citizens of this country used to be accountable for their actions and more considerate of others. These traits still continue. Americans are basically nice people, but as a society we are losing the characteristics that made us the strong individualistic people due to this lack of accountability. There is a movement (I call it an insurgency) to replace responsibility and accountability with excuses. Imagine trying to run a business like this. It is an unnatural, sick philosophy.

Just today, noticing a charge called “periodic service charge” on my statement, I tried calling Bank of America. After going through three sessions of 5-8 choices of pressing numbers, none of which had anything to do with the issue, finally I reached a real live person. She knew nothing about the service charge and switched me to a specialist who knew more of the same and promised to call me back. I’m still waiting. Haven’t you ever wanted to tell someone who uses these automated telephone services to “Press this!"  Am I the only one who finds these systems just plain rude? A customer’s duty is to let them know how much of your time is wasted as well as the rudeness of it all. By far the most degrading and humiliating experience of all is being forced to speak to a machine. It’s beyond comprehension that anyone can submit to this degradation and still think of themselves as an American.

Now for the kicker, you can’t reach the branch office where your local banker could probably give you the information in a second. They have no local listing. You have to call a central number where they must be running an “Outreach” program for the unemployable. The local office isn’t listed in the telephone book. I tried 411 and asked for the Bank of America and the only listing is a central office. If they really didn’t have reachable telephones (they do, but it’s somewhat of a secret) there, my money would have gone somewhere else. This would have been unfortunate because my banker, Jeannie Callis went beyond the call of duty to sell me on becoming a customer and this branch won an award for service, but that doesn’t excuse Bank of America for not understanding the meaning of real service.

In every instance automated telephone systems are an aberration, designed to annoy and waste their customer’s time. At the very least, the first option should be to reach a person.

The bigger the company, the more ponderous the system--the government and the telephone companies, more versed at punishing customers, are the worst, followed closely by credit card companies and utilities. If however you select the option “If you want to make a payment,” you can get right through. How can anyone consider this service?

When you call Floor to Ceiling Stores corporate offices, a real live person answers the telephone and her voice is sweet music. If the person you’re trying to reach isn’t reachable at their desk or through paging, Rita Fletcher will physically hunt them down. Always happy, ever welcoming, Rita makes you feel as if she was just waiting for your call. People judge your company, no matter how large, by the attitude of the person answering the telephone. Businesses that think they are saving money through automated systems are fooling themselves. Real people like Rita are worth their weight in gold. Then again, if the best a company can offer to answer the telephone is an unfeeling drone, then possibly an automated system is preferable.

 Is your business designed for you or for your customer? Machines have slowed everything down for customers. If the “swipe” doesn’t work, then the clerk has to put the 20-30 digit numbers into the machine manually while you wait. Let them do their accounting on their time, not my time. What about businesses that make you process your own credit cards? I continually amazed when watching women in the supermarket line obediently take out their credit cards and as if they’re the employee, swipe and enter numbers to process their own cards. I understand now why many women are predisposed to vote for Democrats. They like the security of belonging to the group and following the party line. Any customer who accepts this unpaid servitude is a fool. I’m sorry, but I tell them, “You do the credit card.” Gone are the days when you could just pay your money and get out of there.

I know people who interact with machines lack people skills. I’m convinced that those who use ATMs don’t want to suffer the indignities encountered by being rejected by another person. Machines are another destroyer of society as it used to be. Forced to become versed on making my own arrangements on Travelocity (they punish me for making online miscues with a $10 fine), arrangements were made to travel to Milwaukee. After checking and not receiving my usual e-mail confirmation, I called Travelocity to find out why and was told my reservations were rejected. They proceeded to make arrangements for me, however not at my selected times.

Arriving at the airport, the Continental agent informed me that I was scheduled on the later flight which was the one from which I was told I was rejected. The time was better for me, but not after I had gotten out of bed at 4:00am to catch the earlier flight. Showing her the confirmation of this early flight, she huffed and said that wasn’t the flight she had on her computer, so I asked if she could get me on the earlier flight anyway. She scowled and looked as though she was going to become apoplectic. However, she booked the earlier flight and, surprise, with no surcharge. Next I asked for a new itinerary as my return flight was also changed. This is a one-button process, but you would have thought I had asked her to carry my luggage from the parking lot. She made all the changes without skipping a beat with no arguments, but her attitude was punishing. What would it have cost to have been pleasant when it took the same amount of time? What kind of parenting did this girl have? Every week I get mailings from Continental asking for business. Save the postage.

Later, my American express bill arrived with two charges on it. I guess the Continental agent found a way to get even with me for having the gall to question the reservation. So I called Travelocity. They have conferred preferred elite status on me which is supposed to get me better service than the peasants. Shouldn’t everyone be entitled to exemplary service? Part of this works as I no longer have to sit on hold for minutes and am able to reach either my elite specialist or concierge by violently pushing the “0” button when a machine orders me to speak. I am told that I must contact a different company that handles the package deals and they give me a fax number. This means I have to traipse into another building where the only available fax machine rests and dial in the fax number they gave me. A human voice answers the fax. Obviously the wrong number has been given. Back to my office where I call Travelocity, press “0” violently and let them know the situation. They will get another fax number. “I’m not going to do it,” I retort and they offer an e-mail address. I re-write the message, attach some information and send the e-mail. The next day my e-mail page informs me the e-mail has been rejected. Back to Travelocity, press “0” violently, get an agent (by now they know me) and insist on an address. They give me a number to call and the company, Last Minute Deal, tells me to fax it. I launch into a diatribe about how anyone who uses machines has a low IQ and insist upon an address. I rewrite the description of the problem, copy the paperwork needed and mail a letter the old fashioned way.

A month and a half later and the charges haven’t been deleted. Calling Travelocity, violently pushing “0” so I’m not degraded by a talking machine, a snippy girl named Monica answers and gives me no help at all. Asking to speak with a supervisor, she informs me I will be 15-20 minutes on hold. Honest, this really happened. This is, of course, the point at which I decide never to give this company any business.

Whenever you call most companies and you can’t get by the machine, you are asked to punch in your account number and the last four digits of your social security number. When you finally reach someone, she asks you for the same numbers. How stupid is this? Contacting customer service on the web is futile with most companies. Clicking on customer service provides you with a list of options where they can sell you something. I guess they want you to believe they never get complaints. Mailing addresses and telephone numbers are almost impossible to get on most sites, even on American Express.

Two weeks later nothing comes from Travelocity, so I call and go through the entire ten minute explanation again. This time my elite Travelocity specialist is a girl named “Petty.” She knows Monica and agrees she is a bitch, takes down all the information pleasantly, even personably, and promises to call me back right away. One week later and there is still no telephone call.

Mail, of course, has its own problems. In Port Haywood, VA, we have the best Postmaster (this is the correct word) Roberta who handles my mail, catches my mistakes and even fronts the postage when I forget my money. However, wander into a P. O. in a town of more than 500 people and the employee selection process has to be who is the genetically meanest. Roberta tries every way possible to make mail happen, but elsewhere it is a game to find some reason they can return your mail and the Postal (Service?) is extremely skilled at doing this.

Any idea having to do setting up your company, making it more efficient, profitable or productive is a negative move if it inconveniences your customers in any manner. Unfortunately, there aren’t many Warren Tylers left who will do you the favor of taking their time to tell you what aggravates your customers. Most customers will suffer silently and finally just decide to not do business with you. Even more destructive, they will tell everyone they know not to do business with you and insidiously, you will never know it’s happening. Studies reveal that up to 30% of the consumers in a market area will never do business with a company because of something they heard and the company knows nothing about it, nor are they able to do anything about it.

If you think that customers like to complain, you couldn’t be more wrong. They want their questions answered politely, efficient service and what they purchased to work. Customers hate to complain. Through experience they know that whomever they complain to will usually be defensive, give them a hard time or deny the concern. For most of us, it isn’t worth the effort. Only when the problem is so egregious will we screw up our courage and make that dreaded call. Proof of this is in the fact that every reader of this book has something in their own home that they should have complained about, but didn’t. There it sits providing less service than it was designed for or looking not at all as we envisioned. If you think people like to complain then you must like to complain, because after all, we are all customers. “I have met the enemy and it is us!” (Pogo)

This book is written to help set up business systems designed for the customer to prevent dissatisfaction, make the buying experience wonderful, search out mistakes, create a culture of service and, in the event that the inevitable mistakes happen, to imbue the attitudes in company personnel that complaint handling is not only painless, but profitable. When you are able to accomplish most of this, you will have separated yourself from every other company in your market area. Fewer than ten companies in all the land are used as paragons of service in current customer service books, which is proof of the rarity of real service.